


Road Trip

by Sela21k



Category: Stargate - All Series, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Angst, Best Friends, Episode Tag, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-15
Updated: 2011-09-15
Packaged: 2017-10-23 18:20:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/253447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sela21k/pseuds/Sela21k
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where the car would have been filled with gossip and giggles, there was now only the sounds of Sam’s ragged weeping.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Road Trip

That it had initially been Janet’s suggestion made this year’s road trip that much more painful. At first Sam had decided not to go, but after thinking about it a while she realized that now more than ever she needed to get away.

Where the car would have been filled with gossip and giggles, there was now only the sounds of Sam’s ragged weeping. Janet was dead, killed by a random staff blast and Sam set out on their annual road trip alone. They had dubbed it the “Estrogen Express Road Trip” and declared the infamous “Thelma and Louise” as their patron saints. “Just us girls,” Janet had declared in the second year of the Stargate Program. “Seven days of much needed rest, overdue relaxation, and obscene indulgence to clear our systems of all of this heavy duty testosterone poisoning.” Janet had found the full service women-only spa in the mountains, made the reservations and practically had to order Sam to come along. After the first day of slow deep massages and being waited on hand and foot, by luscious, tanned, muscular cabana boys, Sam was so glad Janet had insisted.

Throughout her career Sam had denied herself the company of other women in her areas of the service as she felt it was “expected”. She fought hard against the stereotypes she perceived that limited women in her chosen fields of astrophysics and the military. She had no close female influences in her life and she knew she suffered for it. Recognizing that this resulted as a life out of balance Janet had devised the road trip for Sam as the therapeutic solution.

“It’s easier for you,” Sam had lamented to Janet on the first trip after a couple of apple martinis and a deep massage had loosened her up. “You’re in a profession where you’re supposed to be. Me, I’m the fluke. I’m too smart, too good a shot, too…feminine already for them to understand or admit that I am as a good of a soldier as any of them.”

Janet had let her rant on until she passed out and arranged for a long imported volcanic mud soak and a cucumber facial for her the next morning. By the end of the week of yoga sessions, haute cuisine and late night girl talks Sam was fully rested and felt better about herself than she had since joining the Stargate program. As they checked out she had made the suggestion that they do this at least once a year and Janet agreed. Reservations for next year had been made on the spot and the friends made a pact that nothing short of alien invasion would keep them from it. Nothing ever had. Until now.

The trip was log and lonely. Sam had stopped at their favorite road-side drive in and ordered those terribly greasy chili dogs that Janet always made her eat. She played Janet’s favorite county –western CD’s although she hated them and wept her way into the mountains. When she finally reached the oasis that evening, she was emotionally and physically drained. When asked at the front desk about the second adjoining room in her reservation, Sam could barely speak for the lump in her throat. “I’ll pay for that room, as well.” was all she said.

Sam was here alone. Her friend was dead and although she had shared the initial period of shock and grief with all of the SGC, she had not had the time she needed alone to mourn all that she had lost when her friend had been killed. She had thought about asking Cassie to come along but decided against it. This had always been their time, hers and Janet’s to get away from everything and just be ‘girls’. She needed it to be that again and this trip became a pilgrimage of sorts. With every massage, facial and manicure, Sam mourned the loss of her friend who had taught her how to be a woman and a soldier and fully both. No one at the SGC would understand all that she had lost in Janet as a friend and fellow soldier. No one else there knew all of her secrets and had accepted her for who she was as well as Janet had. Janet’s friendship had made her stronger, strong enough even to accept her death, deal with it and to move on.

At the end of the week when she checked out, Sam was asked if she wanted to make her reservations for the same time next year. Just as she was about to say no, she changed her mind. “Yes”, she said, “The same as this year. Two rooms. You can put them both under my name.”

Sam didn’t know who would be coming back with her the next year, but resolved to search out a young female officer at Cheyenne Mountain and take her under her wing as Janet had done with her. She laughed out loud as she resolved to rename the excursion the “Janet Frasier Estrogen Express Memorial Road Trip”. Although she would miss her friend, her grieving was over. She would give this part of her life meaning by passing on what she had learned. There were no tears as Sam began the long trip back down though the mountains, just an overwhelming sense of Janet’s presence and loving approval.

**Author's Note:**

> Orig. Publish Date: August 15, 2006


End file.
